You're kind of trying to be Bukowski and kind of not quite getting it. Still, I love the concept.

This has potential spilling out of every pore, but you need to pare it down a little. Polish, sand and polish. Poet, you know the drill.

Yup, agreed; it's a first draft, not that every poem isn't. I hadn't considered Bukowski, though that's interesting-- I was actually inspired by a fictional poet who never wrote a line of verse, i.e. some monster of my fancy. Thank you for your comment. Was there anything specific that struck you?

--
_{Two times two is four is a most obnoxious thing--
why, in my opinion, it's sheer impudence. It has a cocky look.}

Beautiful // Waste.

Oh damn, now I have to engage my brain. ^.^ If that's a monster of your fancy, I want to see the beauty there; it's probably spectacular.

As to the critique--I got lost in that fat first stanza. You're telling me many things, and yes, distracting me from what you're trying to say, but not in a good way. This bit:
"Well unless your leg has fallen asleep you don't know what I'm talking about
and if it has then you do and you know
it doesn't matter if it's your left or right or what.
Talking about this is just you trying to distract me
from whatever it was this poem was going to say. "

... feels pretty unnecessary when looking at the poem as a whole. The idea needs to be there to keep it cohesive, but the way it's said can be pared down to two lines, or maybe one. Then again, I am of that loathsome camp that wants every word to have a meaning. Annoying, aren't we?

The last line is wonderful. Ties the whole thing together with one elegant, simple phrase that makes you remember where you were all along.

When it's not 2 am (at this point) on a school night, I want to read more of your poetry. You've got a style, a feel and a flow to your words that is natural and smooth. I really, really like.

I love everything about it, especially the whole part about the binding. Wow.

i can't wait to write with a kid holding onto my leg.

i used to have a friend who would only read things that were classified as "literature"... "fiction" was beneath her. if it didn't hurt, it wasn't worth reading. now i love a good book or poem that really makes you think, but if i get to the 10th page or line and i'm drifting off.... well.. maybe that's just not my kind of lit. life's too short to read things just because they're "important". perhaps why we are no longer friends

--
In my dream, the angel shrugged & said, If we fail this time, it will be a failure of imagination & then she placed the world gently in the palm of my hand.

Brian Andreas

i completely love the ending

and sometimes write poems about myself writing just to get the brain in the mood you know?

--
I wish I had all the world to write, instead of just having all the world.

Sometimes poetry about yourself writing poetry is the only honest thing you have to contribute. I definitely feel that way a lot.

--
_{The richest cities, the grandest landscapes, never contain the mysterious attraction chance forms out of clouds.}

Beautiful // Waste.

haha yeah me too

but your stuff always makes me feel smarter

--
I wish I had all the world to write, instead of just having all the world.